Sunday, December 04, 2016
MEMORIES OF WEDDINGS PAST - I remember being quite alarmed when I met this couple for the first time. When I opened my front door and welcomed them into my home the groom was holding their beautiful new born baby. The baby looked a little treasure fast asleep. I acknowledged their baby and the groom said, 'yeah, the little ##@!! didn't sleep last night'.
It took me quite aback that anyone would call their child by this language. I was starting to think that I would have to decline the booking as my judgements were making it clear that I wasn't going to be comfortable working with them.
However, what happened next was beautiful.
Since we had booked the time together I put my judgement on hold and invited them in. Prompted by my questions they proceeded to share what their vision was for their wedding (with some descriptive swear words included) His bride, a gentle but strong young lady, who was well spoken, did not apologise for his language, she just sat beside him and talked as his equal.
After discussing their reasons for getting married, their love for each other, their appreciation and admiration of their very close family and friends I was opened to a world of love, respect, fierce loyalty and protection. They had been high school sweet hearts for three years and then had some time apart. It was during this time about seven years ago when they realised that they wanted to come together and form a more mature relationship.
They had been together for a total of ten years and decided now was the time to get married. After this sharing and seeing this groom was a diamond in the rough I agreed to be their celebrant. I came to realise that, while he spoke a different language to me, his heart was open and in love with his beautiful fiance and mother of his child.
When it came time to leave, they thanked me and the groom, said he knew he was different and spoke a bit rough but he was very happy I had agreed to marry them.
I received their 'love letters' a few weeks later which I invite all couples to write (and not all of them take the time or interest to do this exercise). I felt honoured to read theirs - they both feel very blessed to have each other and their beautiful little boy.
I am glad I left my judgement by the side and was privileged to participate in their wedding ceremony. They are still doing really well many years later.