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wedding and commitment vows

how to write your own wedding & commitment vows

quotation marksI encourage you to write your own wedding and commitment ceremony vows to declare on your wedding day or celebration of commitment. It will make your ceremony very special, unique and meaningful to you.

Your ceremony vows don't have to be complex and they don't have to be the same.

Consider whether you are going to have them read out by the celebrant and then you will repeat them or if you will read off a card to each other. Memorising them is for a select few only as it puts a lot of pressure on to remember them. If this feels comfortable for you, then by all means do so and have a back up plan just in case you forget for whatever reason.

For in depth ideas on creating your own pre-vows, the asking, the ceremony vows and the ring exchange read the four chapters in Create Your Own Inspiring Wedding Ceremony. (This is suitable for commitment ceremonies as well!)

For a marriage ceremony the only legal requirement for your vows, that must be included within the ceremony, are the words according to Section 45 of the Marriage Act 1961: To be said by both of the parties to the marriage in the presence of the authorised celebrant and witnesses.

'I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, A.B. (or C.D.), take you, C.D., (or A.B) to be my lawful wedded husband (or wife)' or words to that effect

There is also the The Traditional Vow:

“I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, (name), take you, (name), to be my lawful wedded wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, and thereto I give you my pledge.”

sample wedding vows from other couples to inspire you...


(the legal vows may be included in the primary vows, or before or after them, or in the ring vows - your choice)

“Francesca, I choose you above all others as my best friend, my lover and my wife. I love, trust and respect you and will cherish you always. I offer you my care and support with an open heart. Francesca, I will share the laughter and the tears, the joy and the sorrow and embrace all that life brings us.”


"I am honoured to share this life with you as my husband. We share a beautiful friendship that has seen us overcome many hurdles together. I honour your commitment to our relationship and offer you the same. I value your loyalty and dedication to me and our family. With the respect and willingness we share I know what we have will last forever"


"You are my best friend and my dearest companion. I want to make a promise, to you and to myself, in front of our closest family and friends, that I will love you always, I will respect and honour you as the beautiful woman you are, I will support and protect you to the best of my abilities ... all of this with an open heart.  Let us always be friends, lovers and good companions... and grow old together. I love you ... now and forever."


"I call upon everyone here present to witness that I, Bryan, take you, Elizabeth, to be my lawful wife, my lover, my friend and companion. You are my one true love. I trust and respect you and will continue to laugh and cry with you, loving you faithfully through whatever may come. I give you my hands to hold and my life to share, for as long as we both shall live."


"Today I give myself to you in marriage. I love the way we laugh and play together - I love our adventures and know that we will have many more. I appreciate the way we can 'sit in the fire' together, when we get grumpy or out of sorts, and come through the other side with a new perspective. I want to work by your side, holding your hand for many years to come, creating a home that is filled with love and good times. Today I marry you with the greatest respect for what we share."

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more articles by wendy haynes:

> how to discover the right words for your wedding ceremony

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what people say

Heidi, Cairns
Hi Wendy, I have been reading through your site and from feeling overwhelmed at the whole wedding planning now feel more relaxed!

Candy & Lincoln, Sydney, NSW
Your book gave us an insight as to what the important aspects of a perfect ceremony are. Had I not read your book I don’t know whether I would have put so much thought into the most memorable part of our wedding.
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